Road show

Seeing the silver man, the Roman soldier, the clown, and the human water fountain do their tricks – or in silver man’s and Roman soldier’s case, doing absolutely nothing – on the square outside the Cologne Cathedral made me think what I always think when I see street artists.

The boys are back in town.

What do they think when they go to work in the morning. Let’s take the human water fountain man.

He’s a man with a big belly, a little cart he uses for storing the water bottles, and a NY Yankee hat. He gets to the square. He pulls up a 1.5-liter bottle, and starts his schtick.

“Guten Tag, ladies and gentlemen,” he says, and switches to miming.

He points to the water bottles, then to his huge belly which he then shakes.

He pulls up a bottle form the cart and drinks it straight up. He then rubs his belly. Good times. He drinks another one. And a third. People stop and stare. Some smile, some shake their heads. “This is his thing? Drinking?” we all think.

He says something. And all of a sudden all that water he’s drunk makes a big comeback. He’s squirts water through his mouth, nose, like a human fountain. And that’s it. He once again rubs his belly.

So, how did he come up with this act? What goes through his mind in the morning when he gets the show on the road? “Got the water, check,the cart is here, check, belly, still huge, good, good.”

What about the Roman soldier? “I really got the bronze on my face alright today. Where’s my helmet? My sword, check. Let’s go stand.”

This is what goes through my head when you ask me what I’m thinking about and I say “nothing”.

2 thoughts on “Road show

  1. Have you seen one of them get mad? I once saw a silver robot in Barcelona burst out to an old lady who took a photo without paying first. That was some scary stuff. Belly buddy sounds disgusting. Sorry, but…he really does.

  2. I agree with Jessica. As a party piece, after 12 or 15 beers, aged 18, perhaps. In a public square, maybe not.

    As we say in New Yawk, there oughta be a law!

How does that make you feel?