How do you spot a farm boy in the city? His every seventh step is longer (to avoid the ditches). That’s an old Finnish urban joke – not that Finns really can boast with an all too urban state of mind.

However, it seems to me that Stockholm’s pretty crowded with boys from the farms as well. Well, this wouldn’t be Sweden if I didn’t include the women, so let me rephrase that. Seems to me that Stockholm’s pretty crowded with boys and girls from the farms as well.

Only, the ditch system must be different in Sweden because their steps are all alike, just as long (or short). What people in Stockholm do all too frequently is just stand. Stop and stand.

In any other urban metropolitan city, people walk briskly, with a clear intention of where they’re going, and they let the people around them know that. They are also aware of where everybody else is, a Londoner’s or a New Yorker’s sense of space seems quite advanced.

Not so much over here. Take Kungsgatan, for example. Walking down the street with a hot latte in your hand is like taking on Minesweeper’s advanced level (which, by the way, surprisingly many of my former colleagues were quite good at).

At first, it seems like a piece of cake because people walk so slowly. There’s none of that big city goal-orientedness. Then the slow pace starts to be really annoying so you try to make your way around the slow walkers, accelerating and breaking, and making moves that would make Peter Forsberg jealous when all of a sudden, with no warning, no hint, no signal, the person or the group in front of you just stops.

If they had a sense of space, or if they did bother to take a look around, they would see me do another Peter Forsberg impression. The one where he’s been flattened by an NHL defenseman.

If they did look behind them, they’d see me about a step away, standing on one leg, trying to hold my balance, and the cup even, wondering what just happened.

And when I put my foot down – literally – and continue my walk with a grunt that’s supposed to be an overaccentuated “Ex-CUSE ME”, I can hear them mutter “why are you so angry” at me.

But since I’m not really angry because nobody in Sweden really ever is, we part as friends.

Besides regular streets, there are a few places that attract people to stand and look around more than usual. They are:

1. At the top/bottom of an escalator
2. Getting out of an elevator, and
3. Store entrances.

Consider yourself warned. Keep the lid on.