I don’t know for sure what goes through Mikhail Grabovski’s mind when he scores for Belarus, besides general feelings of happiness and pride, but I wouldn’t be surprised if a part of the mental images his brain produces are of a Belarusian man, named Yas, let’s say, out on the field mowing clover, dreaming about Yanina, a hardworking girl!
That’s what I will be thinking about, anyway, now that I’ve learned what the Belarusian goal song, “Касіў Ясь канюшыну” (Kasiu Yas’ Kanyushinu) is all about. Now, I would have known that earlier had I understood the title of the song, which is, in short: Yas mows clover.
Before the World Championship, the organizers asked all teams to send in their goals songs, if they had any particular wishes. Most did that, some had a song chosen for them. But why do teams pick certain songs? Here are my guesses (and a link to Youtube, denoted with an asterisk).
Belarus: Kasiu Yas’ kanyushinu*
All songs by the prolific composer “Trad” are popular at hockey arenas, and Belarus is no exception. And the message is powerful. It keeps players grounded, and emphasizes the importance of team effort.
Canada: Blur – Song 2*
Woohoooo! Wooohoooo! I’m fairly sure the song also says something about a Zamboni. If I’m hearing it right, they sing, “I got a hip check / buy a Zamboni”. Can it get any more Canadian than that?
Finland: Teräsbetoni – Taivas lyö tulta*
Well, if Finland is famous for anything besides great hockey, it’s engineering (and Angry Birds). And what’s the one thing that you need for advanced engineering? That’s right, reinforced concrete, which is what the name of the band means. Besides, four shirtless dudes in too tight pants yelling at the top of their lungs? That’s called “Thursday night” in Finland.
France: Zombie nation – Kernkraft 400*
No, no, the name of the DJ is not a comment on the team. Say whatever you want about the French defense, but Baptiste Amar & Co are no zombies. While Finns go for the reinforced heavy metal bands, France likes to keep things a little lighter. When they score, they celebrate it like they were in la discothèque. Oui, oui.
Kazakhstan: Kiss – Heaven’s on fire*
KAZ and Kiss just go together so well. You hear Kiss, you think of KAZ. Kiss, KAZ, Kiss, KAZ. Straightforward. Also, the lead singer of Kiss is Paul Stanley so there’s a hockey connection. Stanley Cup, anyone?
Slovakia: Nech Bože dá*
This is the official Slovak hockey song so it was an obvious choice for them. There are three verses, one for each period, obviously. I smile every time I hear the line, “Someone roars, Milan scores!’” (Or something along those lines, I AM relying on Google Translate here).
Switzerland: Avicii – Levels*
What do you get when you score a goal? A good feeling, that’s what. And that’s 100% guaranteed what you’ll be humming to yourself for days after Switzerland scores. Which is why Avicii’s song is their goal song. (Also to lull the opponent into thinking that they, too, have a good feeling).
USA: The Fratellis – Chelsea Dagger*
Ba-da-da-dum, ba-da-dum, ba-da-da-da-dum, ba-da-da-dum, ba-da-dum, ba-da-da-da-dum, ba-da-da-dum, ba-da-dum, ba-da-da-da-dum, ba-da-da-dum, ba-da-dum, ba-da-da-da-dum, ba-da-da-dum, ba-da-dum, ba-da-da-da-dum, ba-da-da-dum, ba-da-dum, ba-da-da-da-dum. If it’s good enough to be the goal song for Glasgow’s Celtic Football Club, Edinburgh’s Hibernian Club, a few soccer clubs in Belgium and Australia, the Baltimore Orioles, the Tampa Bay Rays, the Chicago Blackhawks, and the Washington Capitals, it’s good enough for Team USA. (And if Mats Sundin was humming that after his last NHL game, knowing he’d retire right afterwards, you know it’s a powerful tune).
Everybody’s got a tune here. The Hockey Bird has DJ Slow’s “Hockey Bird (In The Zone)”, but there’s a theme song even for the Zamboni, “Ice machine” by the Laughing sausages.
It makes me want to have a theme song of my own.
Maybe this: